Geckos

We hate geckos. They are not cute.

Unlike the ones in Australia that know their place is on the garden fence, geckos in Mauritius move into your house. En masse.

And then they breed.

They make loud clicking gecko noises at night, and poop all over your walls, furniture and skirtings.

Also on everything in your kitchen cupboards, so check inside your cup before making coffee.

Occasionally, they fall off the ceiling and plop their clammy, wriggly, creepily-translucent bodies on you. Aaaaaaargh – get it off me!!!!

gecko

They make cosy little homes for themselves in your electrical junction boxes and blow up your wiring.

They cause your cat to run up your curtains in an attempt to catch them. Naughty Tipsy!!!

They don’t help control the insect population – they would eat less than 5% of the insects that come in – our electronic insect mats kill the rest. I know this because I sweep up millions of little dead insect bodies.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not against creatures moving into our house. There’s plenty of room.

This little creature has been living in the stairwell and corridor for over a year and I love him. He’s beautiful.

hallway lizard

He moved out temporarily when we had the corridor ceiling repaired, then came back when the builders were gone.

hallway lizard

Even lizards don’t like builders.

But the geckos have got to go.

We bought gecko poison.

You pour it into little plastic cups that you stick to the walls.

If a gecko drinks it, the gecko will die slowly over the next few days, turn black, and its petrified carcass will remain clinging to the wall for Alf to sweep away.

Four things:

  1. you can’t make the gecko drink it
  2. it’s cruel
  3. the sugar ants arrive in droves as it’s obviously sweet
  4. it’s cruel

Getting Rid of Geckos

Dettol or Dettol-based cleaning products (they’re cheaper and work just as well).

Mixed with water in a spray bottle.

Spray it at the geckos, they lose their footing, and they fall off the wall and run away.

Well, some of them leap off the wall, so stand well back.

Most of them run outside. When they come back, do it again. And again. And again.

Etc.

Eventually, they get bored and move next door. Or maybe downstairs – I should check.

Anyway, they don’t like Dettol. They even run away at the sight of you.

100% of the credit goes to Alf who googled it and experimented with it.

I love you, Alf, you’re my hero.

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2 thoughts on “Geckos

  1. omg. This is hilarious! I like geckos, surely they are better than cockroaches? (especially the ones that fly at your face and make you scream like a little girl, LOL) I will be back to read some more of your adventures; go downstairs and check! (give naughty Tipsy a cuddle from me please) xxxx

    • The roaches here don’t fly at your face – the kamikaze giant moths do – huge bloody things that are only attracted to me – Alf’s never had the pleasure – but if he did, I’m sure he’d scream too! Like a big hairy girl! xx

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